Round 2 Summary; Round 3 Predictions

OK, I absolutely honk at this. I went a mildly respectable 4-4 in the first round, but the second round was not nearly as friendly: 1-3. That's a grand total of 5-7. Mediocrity at it's finest.

Here's how it all turned out:

Eastern Conference (Second Round)
(1) Ottawa (4-3) --- (4) Buffalo (4-1)
(3) New Jersey (4-2) --- (2) Carolina (4-1)

Western Conference (Second Round)
(8) Edmonton (4-3) --- (8) Edmonton (4-2)
(7) Colorado (4-2) --- (6) Anaheim (4-0)

Who would've thought these teams would make this year's final four? Some are saying that's the parity of "The New NHL." Frankly, I'm not convinced of that yet. I'm not even close to being convinced, really. When you think about it, the four teams who have made it this far are here because they have simply outplayed their opponents.

Sure, you have teams like Edmonton who were able to pick up Chris Pronger because of "The New NHL," or Anaheim doing the same with Scott Neidermeyer. But the so-called "parity" - the new fancy-schmancy word that everyone seems to be throwing around to make us all sound smarter - won't prove itself until at least next year, probably the year after.

Let's wait to see if Carolina has another three-year gap before they even make the playoffs again. Let's wait to see who Anaheim's new goalie will be that can carry them deep in the quest for the Holy Grail. Let's wait to see if Edmonton, with all the hype and momentum they've gained this year, will pull a Calgary next year. (Let's wait and see how many people will pick them to win it all next year!) Let's wait and watch Lindy Ruff coach another 15 years in Buffalo before they make the playoffs again because nobody else wants that job.

In my estimation, "The New NHL" should be more about consistency than about parity. More about dynasties than about one-year wonder's. But hey, what do I know? I honk at this.

Here's my third round predictions:

Eastern Conference (Third Round)
(4) Buffalo vs (2) Carolina --- (2) Carolina (4-3) ... for the love of God, who somebody please beat Buffalo?!?

Western Conference (Third Round)
(8) Edmonton vs (6) Anaheim --- (8) Edmonton (4-1)

More to follow later. GO OIL!

Everything Is Going to be OK

I must admit, I was a little worried when the Toronto Maple Leafs relieved coach Pat Quinn of his duties. But now, I'm relieved. I'm relieved that, like an old but wise cat, he's landed on his feet again.

I think you can find him at a downtown Vancouver location. It's the one where all the employees are now wearing helmets (visors are optional) and only serve double-double's while wearing hockey gloves. Everyone who works there is older and slower than the workers at all the other Tim Hortons except the manager; he's close to half Quinn's age, but apparently they get along just fine.

He'll answer to, "Oh, Fritter-boy?"

IMPORTANT MEDICAL ALERT!

Recently, the Canadian Medical Association announced the new national symbol for choking. I post this for your own safety and well-being.

Old Symbol:



New symbol:

Round 2 Predictions

After I posted last night, I checked out the "expert's" picks for round one of the NHL playoffs on TSN.ca. I'm glad to see that I'm keeping up with the likes of Bob McKenzie and Pierre "He's a Monster" Maguire, who posted a 5-3 record in the opening set. I'm dead even with Darren Pang, Bill Berg, and Maggie the Macaque (a macaque is some form of a monkey) at 4-4. Maggie, by the way, was the only one to pick Colorado over Dallas. Safe to say: she's not monkeying around.

Never - I repeat, never - be outdone by a monkey.

Here are the updated round 2 predictions:

Eastern Conference (Second Round)
(4) Buffalo vs (1) Ottawa --- (1) Ottawa (4-3)
(3) New Jersey vs (2) Carolina --- (3) New Jersey (4-2)

Western Conference (Second Round)
(8) Edmonton vs (5) San Jose --- (8) Edmonton (4-3)
(7) Colorado vs (6) Anaheim --- (7) Colorado (4-2)

Round 1 taught me not to predict beyond the round you're in. More when round 2 is done. GO OIL!

Round 1 Summary

So, round one of the NHL playoffs has more than adequately shown why I do not have the gift of prophecy. My prediction for this year's holders of hockey's holy grail, the Calgary Flames, took a very quiet and boring exit out of the post-season; the Ducks of Anaheim proved they really are that Mighty.

All in all, I suppose I didn't do too bad for an amateur prophet. Not too bad, that is, if you're satisfied with mediocrity. And in this case, well, I am. So here's a quick summary of my round one picks:

Eastern Conference (First Round)
(1) Ottawa (4-0) ... (1) Ottawa (4-1)
(2) Carolina (4-1) ... (2) Carolina (4-2)
(6) NY Rangers (4-3) ... (3) New Jersey (4-0)
(4) Buffalo (4-3) ... (4) Buffalo (4-2)

Western Conference (First Round)
(1) Detroit (4-0) ... (8) Edmonton (4-2)
(2) Dallas (4-2) ... (7) Colorado (4-1)
(3) Calgary (4-1) ... (6) Anaheim (4-3)
(5) San Jose (4-1) ... (5) San Jose (4-1)

There you have it: the 1, 2, 3, and 4 seeds advancing in the East, and the 5, 6, 7, and 8 seeds in the West ... the first time a second round of the playoffs has been chronologically correct! Must be the "new NHL."

At the same time, it was nice to see that some things haven't changed since the pre-lockout NHL. Like the ongoing battle for the least classy fans in the league. This little dance has endured since Buffalo and Philadelphia have been part of the NHL. They both punched their dance cards again when Philadelphia's RJ Umberger was launched into next week by Buffalo defenceman Brian Campbell in one of the most violent but clean open-ice hits in recent memory. Umberger lay on the ice motionless for some time after. Once Umberger could correctly answer how many fingers his trainer was holding up, he skated off the ice with some help from teammates. Adding insult to injury, he skated off the ice only to hear the sounds of Buffalo fans in the background cheering Campbell's hit as it was played over and over on the big screen at centre ice.

Just what every guy wants as he's being carried off the ice wondering how far behind him his pride is. I'm sure, if given the opportunity, Umberger would have liked to hold up one of his trainers fingers to the crowd, and I'm guessing it wouldn't have been his thumb.

You see, there's an unwritten rule in hockey that when a hit is that violent, scary enough to silence a crowd of 20,000 people, you don't rub it in by showing replay after replay on the big screen. But Buffalo doesn't dance on the same floor as everyone else.

Then again, neither does Philadelphia. Later in the series, when defenceman Denis Gauthier (intentionally?) speared Buffalo forward JP Dumont, boo's rained down from on high as Dumont lay squirming on the ice. Having recently come out of surgery to remove his appendix, you can understand the difficulty one might have in taking the business end of hockey stick in the stomach. Nonetheless, Philly fans in their ever-supreme wisdom, essentially called Dumont a Nancy-boy and admonished him to suck it up. A few minutes later, he too was helped off the ice by teammates ... to a chorus of more boo's.

Yup, that's class. My only wish going into the Philadelphia - Buffalo series was that both teams could lose. Oh well. At least Philadelphia lost.

And then there's Jaromir Jagr. I'm a little tired of watching a guy that this league calls a superstar shut down every time the pressure is on. Sure, his Rangers choked at the end of the season and ended up with a (6) seed instead of a (3). Sure, he was surpassed rather easily during the last week of the season by Joe Thornton in the scoring race. Sure, he was surpassed rather easily again during the last week of the season by Jonathan Cheechoo in the goal-scoring race.

And that's when Jagr's season ended. It just manifested itself in an injury - again - that wouldn't require J-squared to endure a different kind of pain on the ice.

And then there's Chris Chelios. A 44-year old baby who never does anything wrong and is thereby justified in crying to the ref's about every call that goes against him. HANG UP YOUR SKATES, TONY DANZA! A-O, O-A. I won't waste anymore of my blog on Chris Chelios.

It might appear from this post that I have some issues to work through when it comes to playoff hockey. It's due in part, I'm sure, to the fact the Leafs didn't even make the post-season. Maybe that's why there's more than one round; there's still hope for me :)

Round 2 predictions to follow.